A Grab Bag of Miscellany

Grab bag:  1) a collection of miscellaneous things; 2) a bag from which gifts are drawn at random.

It's fun to shine a little light on the bits and pieces we love, especially if they are incomplete. We love the potential. In between the milestones we all have amassed a collection of miscellaneous things -- a grab bag of advice we strive to remember and follow, as well as ideas and projects that have been started and stopped, or perhaps regretfully discarded along the way. In the end, these discarded ideas are like handfuls of mismatched costume jewelry. They are pretty to look at and sparkle like the real thing if the light catches them just so.

This, in fact, is how I wind up with many unfinished blog posts!  The light catches the idea and then it fades before something else catches my eye.  But maybe, just maybe...you might catch a glimmer.

Grab Bag Item # 1:  A dose of positivity. 

We pretty much know that writers need a regular dose of positivity.  Who doesn't, right? But you know what I mean -- writers, in particular, need special care. Here are lots of ways to assure and reassure ourselves we can and will manage both the must-do and want-to-to items on the horizon.  These are soooo easy, you might not even realize you're doing them.  But stop doing them and there might be trouble.  So, for a dose of stating the obvious...

1.  Think small.  Whether you have a physical list or a mental list of what's coming up, break it down further. I've heard this before, and  this is item #1 in a great post at The Positivity Blog: Mark Twain’s Guide to Living an Awesome Life: 7 Essential Tips by Henrik Edberg, who suggests remembering Mark Twain's advice:

“The secret of getting ahead is getting started. The secret of getting started is breaking your complex overwhelming tasks into small manageable tasks, and then starting on the first one.”

The other six tips are pretty good too. 

For thinking small, I tell myself it's like folding my entire "list" like an accordion to show the first item and "hiding" the rest from my view.  The week ahead or the whole project will unfold.

2.  Sleep.  Yes, really.  It sounds obvious, but it's hard to think of one thing that will slow you down more than lack of sleep.  Try for that eight hours a night. 

3.  Let your dreams do some of the work.   This one's a little less obvious than sleep.  You'll either be on board with this idea or think it sounds kooky. But give it a try. If something is not coming easy, tell yourself to "sleep on it."  Sometimes when I am frustrated with trying to memorize or grasp concepts (or work out plots) I just give in (not the same as giving up).  After sleeping on it, I'm often amazed at how much is within my grasp the next day of what confused and/or eluded me only yesterday.

4.  Double-dip.  This is the best one.  You can't not like getting a 2 for 1 deal.  Like sleeping and dreaming.

***

Grab Bag Item # 2: The Power of Page 18, Line 4 - Writing Prompts Found in Random Places

Recently, I stumbled upon a Facebook post that said, "this should be fun, pick up the nearest book, page 18, line 4."

Right. Yet another little game on social media. And yes, part of me had to roll my eyes at the cryptic nature of these instructions. I get a little annoyed, you see, with the fragmented nature of communication made up of posts and texts. I blame it on the writer in me, of course. As a writer, I always I crave more. But I tried it and yes, it was kind of fun. In fact, it prompted so much more, as I found with my first random Page 18, Line 4, taken from one of my nearest books:

"Emma was relieved by his absence, and after an hour or so of..."

Of what? Why was Emma relieved by his absence? 

Hmm. Already there are questions from this. It did strike me as a great writing prompt for a story. The book, by the way, was Liar Temptress Soldier Spy: Four Women Undercover in the Civil War, by Karen Abbott.

So yes, there's power in Page 18, Line 4. Give it a try! And yes, you can cheat. I know I did! Because, although it seems like I got lucky more times than not, not every example I found was all that inspiring or thought provoking -- at least not to me. I'm also thinking this little exercise might work best with non-fiction books, but that's just a guess. 

***

Grab Bag Item #3: Update to the blog post Pre-made Romance Covers and Where to Find Them

This is as good a place as any to announce an "update," of sorts, to a popular post. Your search for a book cover, after all, is an activity to match your great ideas behind the cover with something that catches your eye with the right sparkle. As with any post that has links, it tends to get out of date. While I did not take the time to search out new information, I did test what was there and removed the broken links. Happy browsing, if you're so inclined to do so!

After the Big Finish and Bargaining with the Muse

As we all know, finishing a big writing project is great. Euphoric. The End has arrived. For months, or perhaps years, you have lived with the absolute uncertainty it is actually going to happen...until it does. *Jump for joy and set off fireworks!*




Well, that was fun. I wish it would have lasted longer. Let's do it again.





Better? Yeah! Again? Sure! *Repeat as many times as you want.*

Eventually, sorry to say, you come back to earth. Now what? What's next? I know, everyone is different in how they answer. Maybe some people jump into the next big thing. As for me, I can't imagine it. For me, I find the euphoria after the big finish comes skipping in, hand-in-hand, with a declaration of never again. Absolutely, no way am I going to do that again! Writing a novel is nuts. It made me nuts. I'm done. I'm exhausted from building worlds and breaking and mending hearts.

And so it begins. Along with the euphoria of finishing, there is always a time of superstitious bargaining with my Muse. Ugh! It's a difficult transition after months of welcoming crazy, plot twisting, chaos filled ideas that have changed the story and moved the characters toward their goals. It makes me nervous to start making demands now, when I know, because we've been living together for so long, that the Muse tends to get a little bored with reasonable arguments. She knows best. She knows she can convince me. But still, I try. It is time for a break. Not only did I finish a novel, I finished a series. I deserved a break, right? I waited a long time for this.

Does she care? I'm not sure. Does she know I'm not entirely serious about never again? I'm not sure. In the back of my mind, as I break from this story, this familiar world, with days and weeks of deciding what is next, I start to worry. Maybe I was too harsh. Too ungrateful. Yes, it was all about me. I could have said it better. Break ups are hard. Saying "it's not you, it's me" never works out well. But there are times when you want the distance. Truth be told, my Muse and I have broken up many times before the big finish.

So, she knows, right? She knows I'm not entirely serious. It's nothing more and nothing less than a ritual after every big finish. And that's a good thing to have as a writer. It means I have been at this place before. I can get here again. It doesn't matter how many times I thought I never would while in the midst of the murky middle or struggling to figure out the ending.

Those struggles linger. After the big finish, I find myself staring blindly at the last page before the euphoria sinks in. I suppose part of me lingers, imagining the future not written. I do this as a reader, and I think I do the same as a writer, only this time I'm listening, one last time. I'm wondering if there is anything else I need to add, any last requests? Or even some complaints. The Muse, my definitely not on-call expert in making trouble, has to be satisfied the characters haven't had it too easy. She would think nothing of sending me back, all the way to the beginning if need be, to rewrite things to her liking! But finally, even she, I think, is standing in the wings brushing a tear from her eye. She nods her approval and it's enough. It's good. She does have a heart, after all.

*Big sigh.* Yes, it's done. We can all say farewell. I can blink again. And, yes, jump up and down and set off fireworks! That clarity of closure, by the way, is the best feeling.The writer too, needs a happily-ever-after.

So, yes, the reward is great. But so is the commitment. After the big finish, is it any wonder it takes time to be brave enough to set off on the journey again? To listen to a demanding cast and want to give them what they want until the Muse jumps in with an idea to do the opposite? She knows I will be persuaded to her way of thinking, even if it will push back all optimistic expectations of when the big finish will happen. It will. It does. You keep going, encouraged by knowing each story gets better, knowing, on the good days, that maybe your abilities are getting closer to matching that vision of the "story in your head." You try for more. You don't give up, even if it seems like no one is waiting to read this story or if all that is driving you is maybe nothing more than that a search for that sense of closure, whether it's for yourself or for the characters you love. Or even the Muse.

Yes, it is good to have finished again. Finishing again means we have faith the Muse will come back. You could even say it's inevitable. Yes, that will make you cringe, just a little. Inevitable doesn't have  as comforting a ring to it as having faith does. But we all know writing a novel isn't a comfortable way to spend your time. It's a constant tug of war of wanting to do it and not wanting to do it. And, after the long awaited big finish, you will want the Muse to come back, but just not right away. Is that too much to ask? You ask. How about we both take a break? But not too long, you add quickly. Don't forget me.

I think it's been long enough. I think. Only, I don't think my Muse and I are entirely on speaking terms yet. Actually, I wonder if maybe she's spending time in the world we built. That would be just like her, to make me go searching as a way to tempt me back. (I bet she has plans for Lilian, a beloved secondary character. Who knows what trouble she's getting her into. She did hint at a few ideas...) But, no. I told her no! Maybe, one day, but not yet. I'm trying out a new story. New characters, a brand new world...

Yes, I know, never again. Famous last words and all that. The thing is, it feels a bit like maybe my Muse is new to this too. Hey, wait a minute. Did she send a replacement? That would be another thing just like her. To send me a temp. Or, if I keep trying, if I commit to listening, will she step in? How long before I know for sure it's really her? I guess only time will tell. Eventually, after a lot of trouble making, I'll know.

You Won't Really Know Until You Do It

Hello!  It's been a while since I've posted because of my college classes and, while I do get the urge to blog, I also wonder what I could possibly have to say that's relevant to writing and romance!  I'm immersed in a different sort of world of biology and chemistry, and even I can push the analogies only so far. *grin*

But I do have a new mantra of sorts this semester, and it's one that I hope will carry over to writing:

 You won't really know until you do it.

Perhaps it's a rather obvious little gem, but this relates -- and in a round-about-way is as close as I'll likely get to an answer -- to some writerly questions I've pondered on the time spent preparing for and researching what I'm going to write about.  Not just about facts and descriptions, but the works...from plot to character motivations and everything in between.

Question #1: How much is enough preparation and information collected before we get to the doing of writing?  

Good luck answering that one, right?  Maybe only the owl on the old classic commercial who succinctly answered the question "How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll pop?" could help!  (Remember that?    To jog your memory or view for first time, here's the YouTube link: http://youtu.be/LZ0epRjfGLw) 

But I confess, left to my own devices, I can get into a lot a of trouble in this area.  After all, there's a lot of wiggle room in the answer to the question. 

A:  As long as it takes.

Hmm.  That can be a while!  But maybe, the answer to this first question, and any hope of escaping a loop of preparation, hinges a lot on answering a second question.

Question #2:  What do we do when panic sets in about diving into the unknown?

A:  Trial by fire.

Okay, that does sound a bit extreme, but it's appropriate when stuck in the pause before running across hot coals.  Really, when is it ever okay to run across?  Do you count to three and run like mad?  The only way I'd go is if someone pushed me between two and three!

I don't know about you, but I realize I'm often throwing my hands up in protest at tasks.   My first response to new information (whether assigned by a professor or suggested by my writing Muse) is often:  "you want me to do what?"

I try not to say it out loud.  No, instead I'll nod like I'm taking it in stride, while inside I'm thinking some form of this incredulous "you want me do do what?" question.  Whether I think I know too much or too little about the task ahead of me, the follow-up thoughts going through my head are either, "really, I'm clueless," or "whoa, this is going to hard."  Information, it seems, can be dangerous...at least to my confidence. 

 But at some point we have to dive in and do the "lab work" (i.e, the writing).

Oh, the dubious joys of a lab class.  "Lab" is the DOING and each of my classes this semester has a lab component.  Two are indoors and one is often outdoors doing field work.  For each there is pre-lab work to be done.  For one lab there is a "pre-lab lecture" and forms to fill out.  (Things to know, like:  "concentrated sulfuric acid will vigorously attack tissue.  Avoid contact..etc.")  For another lab, there is a "research prospectus" to be drawn up of what you intend to do out in the field.  (Lots of unknowns to assume will go smoothly.) For another lab the preparation is just a "monster syllabus" as I think of it...pages and pages of scientific names that is merely a "head-up" for the critters (parasites) I'm supposed to somehow commit to memory. 

Personally, I find all the pre-lab exercises part the intimidation factor.  If I didn't have the push of deadlines for these labs when I had to show up, I would always want at least "one more day" to prepare!

But what I've discovered is:

1.  The things you do in the lab (and in the writing) will be vastly different than what you imagined.
2.  It won't be as bad as you think.
3.  There are do-overs.

In the DOING the impossible becomes possible.  It is difficult, but in one step at a time (or several quick steps!) it gets done.  Nobody gets hurt.  Much. But even if the worst you can imagine happens, the mistakes can be fixed.  You realize that some of your preparation would have done you little good.  Only in context does it become meaningful and individualized to your experience. 

We don't always get a push, but we can trust we are prepared to handle what comes up.  You won't really know until you do it.

I don't regret a lot of my "preparation and information gathering."  After all,  I just might write a story where my historical research and lots of other trivia comes in handy.  If I can find it.  But there's a big chance I won't know until I'm in the thick of things.  Sometimes the best results can come from taking the initial "you what me to do what?" information and running with it.

Maybe I'll put on my chem lab goggles on to write...just to make me feel official and prepared. :)  It can't be too dangerous in the story, but just in case...

A New Year of Writing Decisions

Happy New Year!  Here's to a wonderful year of  rewards. I hope this is the year we cross the finish line with our writing goals and get that medal. Or maybe several medals. Maybe this is our Olympic year. 

Or maybe it will be next year. 

Oops.  Did I hear a screech like an old record makes when the music is interrupted?  Sorry!  I didn't mean to make the music stop, but I just want to put out there that it's OKAY if our Olympic events aren't right around the corner.  We're working on it.  After all, the athletic Olympics only come around every four years so maybe we're still deep in training.  (Well, every two years of alternating winter and summer games, but you know what I mean.) 

This is why I don't like to make resolutions that seem to say we start the race on January 1 with no consideration for the training,  habits or practices of the past.  These resolutions assume that somehow we will know how to fly because we've changed from a caterpillar into a butterfly.  We forget that even this does not happen overnight.  Or that a newly emerged butterfly has fragile wings. 

And maybe our characters are also like these changing creatures.  We're like coaches/choreographers to a team of caterpillars and newborn butterflies dreaming of competing in the Butterfly Olympics. It's our job to get them there...

We start by building our team around two star players.  Long before this pair gets their wings, they will have brought with them an entourage of characters/caterpillars for our team.  Relatives, friends and co-workers all get in with a good word from the stars.  And sometimes villains and new players come to us from parts unknown.  Some make the team and sometimes we have to cut a player or put him or her on the sidelines.  Maybe their turns will come. 

And during all the tough days of training we make decisions and search out the best advice for our team.  We consult with experts and voraciously read their how-to manuals.   We try to emulate the starring teams from the last Olympics.  We might have exhibition matches for feedback and tally up the judge's scores. 

We try to do all the right things for preparing our Olympic team but at some point there still will be a string of dark days in the training.  We might even miss the scheduled Butterfly Olympics we put down in red ink on the calendar.  Some of the caterpillars refused to metamorphose into butterflies and the ones that did are out there fluttering around flowers and teasing cats.  We think nothing can salvage this group or bring them together.

How can this be?  It isn't as if you don't have a lot of advisers.  Only it seems like for every expert brought in to say one thing there is another who says the opposite.  For every judge or critique group reader that says one thing there will be another who says the opposite.  Everyone has an opinion on which direction to go until you, the poor coach/choreographer, don't know which way to turn. 

Who do you listen to?  Who are you to decide on a game plan when surrounded by experts more experienced than you in Butterfly Olympics?  Never mind that they've frightened away the butterflies.

Maybe if you sit still long enough one of your butterflies will land on your finger.

She trusts you. 

Only you are allowed to know which direction she wants to fly.  And one by one, the rest of the butterflies will be drawn to you too. 

Before you know it, the team is anxious for your advice and hovering close by for the next idea.  They want to be a part of the Butterfly Olympics.

***   ***   ***

This year I'm thanking my advisers, but putting them "on call."  I respect them and know I'll need them again but I will be careful not to let them frighten off the butterflies.  I know my decisions are right when the butterflies land.

Thanks for joining me for another year and best of luck to you and your team of butterflies!

Little Quotes that Talk Big

I love quotes. In fact, I think Bartlett's Familiar Quotations would be a great book to be stranded on a deserted island with...as long as I had some paper to write with too, that is.

Quotes motivate, inspire and some get ingrained in our psyche and become old, familiar friends. I can turn to them again and again when I feel like I expect too much from my words to even get started. My favorite quote, although not to be found in Bartlett's, is:

"Blah, blah, blah...GOLD!"

I found this one years ago in Joel Saltzman's great little writing craft book If You Can Talk, You Can Write. In that mysterious method of creation of an analogy, the author thought to compare panning for gold to writing, and I think of this little gem often. It "talks big" to me as a perfect analogy for the writer's seemingly tenacious belief that effort will be rewarded -- even when all you seem to find is sand, sand, sand. And when the words do sift out, the writer recognizes the gold following a dry spell of bland words with almost disbelieving, giddy relief.

Then, the process begins again. A writer has to sift through a lot of words to find anything of value, but all we need is a glimmer of the shiny stuff to give hope to keep looking for more.

Another thing, besides being motivational, that I love about quotes is that they can inspire words in a way similar to a writer's prompt. It's like the quote is a nugget of a universal truth that can be taken out of context and used as a building block to something completely different. Often, the author's intended meaning of the complete work is miles apart from a portion of it, but that's okay. There's nothing wrong with saying thanks for the idea and expanding it to our own ideas.

One method for this is when an author uses the quote to preface a chapter. I love this method in stories and I always wonder which came first for the author; the quote or the chapter? I personally find it hard to go back into my story and try to match what I wrote to a quote, but thereverse seems easier; write a chapter loosely around a quote. For instance, in a chapter where the hero begins a deception, I couldn't help but think of the line:

O, what a tangled web we weave, when first we practice to deceive. - Sir Walter Scott

This was a little quote that talked big to me and I liked the foreshadowing at the beginning of the chapter. The quote set the tone. And in front of Part II of my book, for the same reasons, I put my own words:

And all my heart’s desires
Beat their way into existence
As soon as I took your hand

Yes, it was literal. She did take his hand...and life changed forever. :)

Quotes can do a lot, whether my own words or someone elses. Usually it is hard to pin down which inspiration came first, but I think I have an idea what I'm looking for but don't know it until I see it. Currently, I have a couple of quotes I'm thinking of using for my chapters of "River of Tears." For instance:

You furnish the pictures and I'll furnish the war. -- William Randolph Hurst (attributed instructions to artist Frederick Remington in Havana Cuba [March 1898]

To me, this fits for my hero being a photo-journalist and ideas for the plot. Another is:

There are two ways of spreading light; to be the candle or the mirror that reflects it. -- Edith Wharton

This one seems to sum up the feeling of inadequacy in my heroine who thinks she is the "mirror." I'm not sure where that quote might go, but it does have a place for the overall theme.

Sometimes I find the words and it's a wonderful feeling. More often I don't. Oh, well. *sigh* I'll keep panning for gold. Or maybe Bartlett's will help me out...

What do you love about quotes? Favorites? Do you have any little quotes that talk big for your characters or your plot?

Are You Qualified?

"Proficient in observing human nature and in recognizing writing rules in order to break them."

What the heck is that, you ask? It's uhm, my qualifications. My skills. You know - - to be a writer.

It's an odd set of skills a writer has. Unusual not just for their characteristics, but because they don't often get written down. When would they? It's not like they are are the kind of skills that go on either a resume or go in a query letter. Unlike a pitch for a 'normal' job, where people want and expect you to tell them your skills (a different sort of skills), pitching writing is more about providing proof.

What if conventions were switched around? In a reverse situation, it strikes me as interesting that summarizing a writer's qualifications or skill set in a few sentences that say "I can do this. I'm qualified because I have these skills," would look decidedly odd written on a resume. It would feel odd to write them too.

It occurs to me that this inability to define a skill set and speak it out loud goes a long ways toward explaining writers being tentative for claiming 'writer status.' Putting those skills down in black and white is part of what gives you confidence. For instance, bear with me, but I have a "summary of qualifications" section on my resume (in my former life):

Proficient in law firm procedures such as filings with courts, client file maintenance (opening, closing and dead storage tracking), working with vendors (travel agencies, catering services, copy services, court reporters, etc.), attorney time keeping, expense report preparation and dictation. Software proficiency with Microsoft Office applications, Docs Open, MacPac legal.

This list of facts says I can do the job. I could even read this out loud without feeling too silly. Sort of. LOL It also gives pretty obvious clues as to the identity of my job. It shouldn't be too hard to guess legal secretary.

But how do I summarize and declare my writer skill set? How about ignoring convention and writing your own "short list" of writing qualifications?

I actually believe my short list is true as a basic skill set for a writer. When I think about what a writer must be skilled in, I do think, he/she must be:

1. Proficient in observing human nature. This seems obvious, but we are writing for humans, even if that human is ourselves. Our number one task is simply to write about what other humans can identify with and relate to as a shared experience. Then, because it is human nature, the reader will "need to know" more - - page by page. Sometimes it seems like a psychology degree is a pre-requisite, but a finely honed skill of observation is all that's required. Not all of us pay attention to this talent, but a writer is trained to observe not only the reality, but to also see the possibilities or contradictions of every situation. Donna Cumming's blog says it best on the her site All About the Writing with the blog: Observing Humans in the Wild

2. Proficient in recognizing writing rules in order to bend them. Yes, bend them. First, you have to know what conventions you're bending, but it's in the choosing to bend known rules that your voice comes through with the most clarity. The blog from Edittorent In Defense of Modifiers gives some great examples of breaking a few rules with a purpose. As for knowing the rules in the first place, that's a longer journey.

* * *
That's it. Only two skills are necessary to 'qualify' as a writer. I can claim these two skills as much as another legal secretary can claim my legal secretary skill set. It doesn't make me 'special' but it does make me a writer. And, in a business of 'proof' before skills are acknowledged, it's important to feel a part of the occupation.

What I do with the skills is a choice - - the same choice as any other job. That's not to say that being a writer or not being a writer is a choice (some days it's a curse), but the question of skill shouldn't be one of the doubts holding a writer back.

I think when we figure out a way to believe in our skills and even say them out loud, then it's a step to claiming 'writer' status with more confidence.

If you had to write a short summary of only two skills necessary to be a writer, what would they be? And...do you meet them?

A Day at the Rodeo

What could be better than a day at the rodeo? Hot sun, the rough and tumble live action of cowboys looking for eight seconds of fame, and the smells and sounds of livestock bucking against the chutes, determined to win the battle of man vs. nature.

Even the mud from heavy rains that turned the parking lot (i.e, field) and the arena into a soupy mess played a part in the atmosphere. What is it about mud that brings out the good nature in people anyway? Even if we don't have a cowboy hat, the clown's corny jokes seem funnier and the stranger sitting next to you seems like a your long lost cousin. Maybe the mud makes the spectators feel like they are sharing in the adventure to a small degree. Like really, what's a little mud sucking at your flip-flops compared to the mudbath the cowboy get treated to every time he's thrown (repeatedly!) from a bucking broncho or snorting bull?

My picture taken on my cell at the rodeo this gorgeous Sunday isn't the best, but I never take good pictures at events where there is action or something I don't want to miss. This is an event like that. I can't do it, but I have a friend who documents everything with pictures and I'm never quite sure if I'm envious of her for preserving the moment or feel sorry she missed being 'in the moment. ' There is so much to be missed!

So, I don't really have a message to relate the rodeo to writing. Only that the experience itself, as a live event, is something to absorb as a shared experience. No notes, just a feeling to capture using your senses and awareness of that feeling of nothing being staged. At any moment, something can happen and you feel a part of it. This is the feeling that gives meaning and sincerity to the singing of the national anthem and, in the case of a rodeo, the "Cowboy's Prayer" (from the North Star Stampede programme, Effie, MN):

Our heavenly father,

We pause, ever mindful

Of the many blessings

You have bestowed upon us.

We ask that you be with us at this rodeo,

And we pray that you will guide us in the arena of life.

We don't ask for special favors,

We don't ask to draw around a

Chute fighting horse, or to

Never break a barrier.

Nor do we ask for all daylight runs,

Or not to draw a steer that won't lay.

Help us o lord,

To live our lives

In such a manner, that

When we make that last inevitable ride

To the country up there,

Where the grass grows lush and green

And stirrup high, and the water runs clear,

Cool, and deep,

That you, as our last judge,

Will tell us that our entry fees are paid.

Isn't that lovely? :) I came away from the rodeo without a lot of technical knowledge, but I think those things can be picked up with research. Feelings to go with the facts? Not so much. :) Those intangible things are a little harder to find.

The Value of the Humanities for the Writer's Well Being

Consider the basic principle of how you feel about doing something you want to do opposed to something you have to do. Pick your poison and pick your pleasure. Like, say...cleaning the bathroom vs. reading a book? Close, but not extreme enough. Let's say the "have to" thing - -cleaning the bathroom - -is more than just an unpleasant job. Padding the plot like only a writer can do, make it worse with some "what ifs?"

What if it has to be done every day for five weeks? And, to a degree that leads you to believe you must be paying a cosmic debt for some bad karma from another lifetime, what if each day the bathroom starts out being in worse shape then it was the day before. What if it doesn't get easier and each day it takes longer to finish. Yes, some dark magic seems to be in the works, which leads you to believe...

*cue spooky music*

... you've been cursed. (It's an absurd curse, but sounds dismal enough to me. LOL)

However, in that same day of eternal bathroom cleaning, you "get" to do something you want: read a book or watch a movie, or attend a play or listen to music or view art. It's something you normally want to do. But now? NOW? *panic!* There is that huge task you've been cursed with to get done. And you ask yourself, how can I be expected to do both? In fact, you have a sneaking suspicion this requirement for pleasure is part of the curse. Actually, you're right. There it is - - in the small print of The Curse Contract: the "get to" part is really a "have to." Suddenly, how much of a treat is the thing you want to do?

In the real world, how is the tug and pull of "have to" and "get to" managed? If I could choose I'd get out of the bathroom job pronto. LOL But noooo, real life isn't fair, and reality often means doing the "have to" and putting off the "get to." Most of the time, we think we're doing ourselves a favor by letting go of the pleasure when it seems to cause more stress by being overburdened.

But what if you'd been cursed and must fulfill both? What if they have equal weight?

I've been busy with a couple of very time intensive classes in summer school and I've discovered something interesting; sometimes doubling up is actually less stressful to some degree. My classes: Algebra and Humanites. See the contrast? Can you guess which I compare to extended bathroom cleaning? (If you love Algebra, this doesn't apply. And I hate you. LOL) At first, I railed against fate for the stress of completing the amount of work in both diverse subjects. In fact, I almost concluded that one or the other had to go. But which one? My Algebra instructor opened the class with the prediction we would "live and breath" Algebra. Funny thing is, the Humanities instructor said almost the same thing (only the Humanities, not Algebra. LOL) And how can I "live and breath" both? (And be a mom and all those other things that seem to be beside the point!)

It turns out though - - much like reading is escapism - - the broad Humanities class has been a welcome balancing factor. Under that comfort zone of self-expression where opinion counts over "right way" and "wrong way," expectations, there are lessons for how to deal with the uncertainty of uncomfortable life choices, which often feel very little like choices at all.

Is this much different than being in a stressful job but always putting off enjoyment until a too far off vacation? Or is this why the things we "get" to do, even though we normally want to, become chores? I think the Humanities (disciplines near and dear to a writer) get undervalued. But do the lessons wait for when we have time? Or is the first lesson to give the Humanities equal weight?

The title and subtitle of my textbook, The Art of Being Human: The Humanities as a Technique for Living, is very appropriate. And in addition to this great value, as a writer, I find nearly every topic between the covers of this book of interest and relevant to what and how we try to put in our stories. Topics such as archetypes in mythology (including the hero, of course), all the big topics of love, happiness, friendship, death and the conflicts in moral decisions. The value of the Humanities is, the process of giving us answers to the questions we hadn't yet thought to ask by providing proof of how humans have been asking and answering the same universal questions. Then we ask again because someone else is bound to be asking too. Maybe an answer is within us as well.

I'll try to get to a blog here and there using this text as a base. In the meantime, the link to the (overpriced) book is below if you are curious.

Breakthroughs that Lead to Rewards or Vice Versa: Part I

With all the soul searching going on about setting New Year's resolutions, I wondered if I'd ever find something concrete to hang on to. (Read previous blog on resolutions for some drifting.) In two ways, I've had mini breakthroughs.

One is in my approach to building a habit of daily writing for my story. The approach of looking at the numbers (word count, page count, time limits) weren't doing a lot for me. Approaching it from the other side, the reward...now we're talking! Rewards deserve fireworks. I'm on a celebration delay. :)

That's a big part of resolutions; the incentive of a reward. But what kind of reward? It has to be personal and something you really want to do. If a movie at the end of the week is a real treat, then that's a good reward. But is really something that inspires the task of writing? Is the reward something you'd really withhold from yourself or do it anyway? That's not such a bad idea, actually, to make the reward something you regularly do. The important part though is making the bargain that the reward comes last.

Writing a blog is my reward. True, call it rather a narcissistic (sp?) reward, but it fits as a personal thing I really like to do. The only problem is when I talk about writing before I actually write on the story. Or, instead of the story. I often take the reward first.

It seems to make sense, for me anyway, to tie the two, writing a blog and writing on the story together and flip them. The end result is simply this: that anything I write about in this blog is a direct result from my daily writing session.

No random topics for a while. My bargain with myself may change, but for now it seems to give me a good shot at establishing a routine and, if not a daily story writing habit, one I feel a little less guilty about. It may sound limiting for blog topics (especially if I didn't write!), but in many ways, it's the opposite. Two days of actual writing gives me lots of material. Do I need to talk about it? Well, yeah. :)

Part II comes from what I worked on in the story today and yesterday. Ever have a breakthrough in your story at a point you didn't even know you were stuck?

What is your writing reward? Come on, be a little narcissistic with your rewards. What did you write on today or yesterday? You did it so feel free to talk about it.

To Have Finished

Happy New Year! Oh, I'd love to say this blog was a big end of year announcement of finishing my current WIP, but no, not quite. It will get there though. Eventually.

There's not a feeling much better than to "have written." But a close second comes from being able to say you "have finished." For nearly anything. Tasks big and small. And not nearly finished, but completely. My mother use to say to my teenage self that the dishes weren't done until all the surfaces were cleaned; counters, table, stove, etc. and the dishes put away. Only then was the job done. I can't tell you how often I dragged my heels over those last details. Why I did so, I still don't know. It's not like I was trying to prolong an enjoyable task. The only enjoyable part was to "have finished."

I was a procrastinator then and, in a large part, I'm a procrastinator now. It's always a struggle to get those last details complete. The odd thing is I will do dishes rather than work on the story. Most things wind up unfinished, and I still don't know the why - - although I've spent plenty of time thinking about it. :)

But something different happened this year. I finished my first book. I finished! Wave that checkered flag, it's done. That's a big thing for the world's best procrastinator to have the feeling of "have written" and "have finished." It is a wonderful, heedy feeling. I want it again, but it's a long time between books, even for a disciplined writer, to experience that feeling.

Just knowing the end will come, one word at a time, did give this procrastinator some food for thought though. I'm not sure if I can say it was life changing without sounding corny, but it does feel that way. Achieving a big goal is bound to have consequences. What else might I finish? Many things, if I keep moving forward. That's my goal this next year; to keep moving forward.

The end is not just possible, but inevitable, if one word follows the next.

Do you have trouble finishing? How did finishing, a book or another big accomplishment, change you?

Are you a sponge?

I know I am. And by sponge, I mean I seem to soak in every outside stimulus and customize it to what I'm writing. And I mean everything. One day, on a blog the comment inspired me to add a pet for my Grim Reaper character. Yeah. As someone pointed out, my grim has a grim. I think it fits. Would I have thought of that without outside influence? I kind of doubt it.

Some people say you can't write in a box. I think that's true. I think too much time alone will accomplish not much more than sharpening some pencils or going into some kind of strange drum solo with those sharpened pencils! Call it inspiration or influence, I know I need something.

Other times, it's not a particular thing, but a mood I soak up like a sponge. There have been days I've felt my whole writing day might sink to the doldrums because I heard some bad news or even talked to someone who was having a bad day. Have you ever done that? Tried to cheer someone up and next thing you know, you're as miserable as they are? Yes, there's truth in the saying that misery loves company. I recall a Grey's Anatamy episode where the doctor's go out to cheer up Derek and next thing you know, they are all missing in action and drowning their sorrows in alcohol. One character after another told a "war" story. "You think that's bad, well there was this time..."

There is a danger and a benefit in being a sponge. If I'm lucky, I might be able to use that darker mood for a scene and I can actually be productive. I have actually managed to use anxiety and social awkwardness in what I hope made a character sympathetic. If I hadn't experienced it, would I have thought of it quite so vividly that day? I doubt it.

Other times, of course, a dark mood will stop the writing cold. Too much and I know I better get some lighter and brighter influences in my life very fast.

I can imagine many good and essential influences. Great writing, movies and music. Pictures that put the image of what you're trying to say in vivid detail in your mind. And I can imagine it's why many writers will write in public coffee shops - for that observation and energy. It's all a matter of balance.

So are you a sponge? Do you find your writing influenced by the daily stimulus around you? Ever find it hard to keep the balance of productive influence?

Music or Silence? Inspiration Now or Later?

I think I'm in the minority that I prefer silence to music when I write. Every once in a while I give listening to music while writing a try, but never quite get the hang of it. I always go back to silence.

I suppose it would help if I had a collection of CDs to choose from or select some songs to play on the computer, but I'm an ordinary radio person who never gives much thought to what I want to listen to. In my car is where I listen to music and I seem to be able to think about the lyrics and carry them with me for later thought. It's a strange, backwards thing that it's actually the writing that makes me tune out the music. So, I guess that's why I don't listen to music when I write - - why bother?

Later, I feel the need to look up the lyrics and I'm often struck by how different they seem in print. A different mood or the whole thing might disallusion me just a bit when I discover it wasn't about what I thought I heard in a few bars of chorus. Either way, it's inspiring, in part or in whole.

A few songs I've heard when in the car have really made me think lately. Michael Buble's wonderful "I Just Haven't Met You Yet" is like the ultimate romantic song! In a word: optimism. It's a good karma song. One of those songs that makes you believe "it will happen" without first making you feel bad. Any single person will get that.

And for a parnormal writer especially, the concept of "I Just Haven't Met You Yet" has infinite possibilites for inspiration. I love the idea that something or someone wonderful is around the next corner.

Another song, or more a phrase of a song is running through my head. "Don't go chasing waterfalls...please stick to the rivers and lakes that you're use to..." That's about all I can remember, but it's personal to the story I'm writing, both figuratively and literally. It's one of those songs (btw, called Waterfalls by TLC) that when I looked up the lyrics it was more than I wanted or needed. What I was drawn to was just the analogy. My current WIP has the hero being an adventurer and the heroine is the opposite. A big part of the conflict is that difference between them. No wonder the song lyrics strike home.

And then there's the ultimate song that tugs at my heart strings. "How Do I Live" by LeAnn Rimes. And I can't imagine any other song that's more than a theme song for my WIP. I am, after all, writing a ghost story. It would be playing in the movie soundtrack. (Yes, that's another fun thing to imagine!)

Chorus:

And tell me now

How do I live without you

I want to know

How do I breathe without you

If you ever go

How do I ever, ever survive

How do I, how do I, Oh how do I live

I absolutely had to print these lyrics, in whole. The link to print "How Do I Live." They are in front of me and I hear the music in my head in some very emotional scenes. I still don't want it playing over and over though. :)

So, the question is, music or silence? Inspiration from music now (in the moment during writing) or later (needs time to sink in) or both? And do you have a theme song for your story? Or any song lyrics, in part or in whole, that inspire you?

Can we just get to the fun stuff?

Setting writing goals and the tasks to achieve them do not actually throw me into a panic. I think I'd prefer a bit of panic to how I feel about making goals. That feeling is more like "blah, blah, blah." Nothing exciting about it. But I do have that nagging voice in the back of my mind getting louder and louder that says you need them. The clock is ticking and you will drown without some goals to grab on to.

So, with good intentions and a bit of induced panic (the picture helped), I put in a Google search to find articles on setting goals.

The first article I found compared setting goals to . . .*cringe*. . . creating a business plan. Hmm. Okay. A long moment of serious contemplation and then I'm kind of fed up. A business plan. That's all well and good, but sorry, a business plan approach doesn't exactly make me jump up and down and say, "hey, let's try it!" Instead it means planning. And that takes time. It will be a long, long while before I can get to the fun stuff.

I quit looking. This need to get to the fun stuff is usually when my goal making hits a snag.

The need for instant gratification is also why my son's room turns into a disaster zone. He doesn't want to put something away before playing with something else. He wants to play. And I get that. Do I ever! Of course, the room does need to be cleaned up and I take half the blame for the size of job it's become. It's not a task anymore. It's many, many tasks.

It's time for: The Big Clean Up.

My inner dialogue, that arguing back in forth to listen to and hush the inner critic, is in many ways similar for both writing and being a mom. Each time the "big clean up" occurs, I'm thrown into guilt for not teaching better habits. For not daily enforcing "putting something away before playing with something else."

We have to do the Big Clean Up together because, a) the mom guilt, and b) a general request to clean the room will go nowhere. His blank look says, where do I start? The job is too big, so we break it down. The dirty clothes in the hamper, the Nintendo games and DVD's back in their cases, etc. And, in the process, I also discover that, left to his own devices, my child will start playing with a newly discovered toy. This distraction is another trait I empathize with! Eventually, the room is clean. The little voice in my head says, yeah, a clean slate for another mess.

But, you know, the strange child actually thinks our Big Clean Up is fun. Yeah, FUN. I guess it's because we're doing it together. Of course, the inner mom critic worries I'm not teaching him independence, but another voice fires back, at least you're not constantly nagging the kid. That isn't fun for either of us. But the Big Clean Up is a game in itself. Even if it's a race to find blocks, missing game pieces or socks.

So, hush, nagging voice. Both for being a mom and for being a writer. I have a big job ahead. My very own Mess and Big Clean Up. It's also sometimes called writing a novel. It's a balance act of when to make a mess and when to clean it up. Goals are of limited value to me when I'm making a Mess. For the Mess, my progress comes on the days I stay in the moment. To remember it's a story I want to tell with characters who make messes. I do have a deadline (yes, that's a good serious word) of the end of the year for the Mess and the Big Clean Up to be complete. Then I'll have a clean slate for another mess.

Do you enjoy the journey? Do goals help you more, less, or equally while making the Mess (first draft) or during the Clean Up (revision)?

How visual are you?

Lately, I've been hearing - - or I should say, seeing a lot of writers use visual aids in their writing process. Some go full out with an elaborate collage. It might be made up of pictures of characters, scenery and locations, or even objects. The idea is it's whatever is personally inspiring to the author. And I keep saying I will do a full collage, but considering how much time I spend just selecting one picture, I probably won't. The close as I usually come to a visual aid is downloading a screen saver. (And it also explains why I rarely have a picture with my blog post!)

But on my WIP, River of Tears, I wanted to get a visual of a scene in New Zealand. Being as I had never been there, I thought it would help. So off I went, looking for the "perfect" scenery pictures. Oh, boy.

My hero and heroine are at a lookout point overlooking a river with a waterfall and a rope bridge. I needed the waterfall in the distance. Not too close. They aren't getting sprayed by water or else I'd have to have them decked out in ponchos. The same went for the river. It has to be rushing fast enough to be loud enough to cover the noise of an approaching helicoptor. (I won't get into that.) And the rope bridge is old. Most I found were too modern or "safe" with touristy guard rails and such . Finally I found just the right one. I'd show you, but it wound up being one that cost something like $400 for the rights. No kidding! So, ah, no. Use your imagination!

I think I found the process something like Goldilocks may have felt. Not too hot, not too cold, etc. So, perfection was my downfall, but I still got an idea of what I was looking for. The images are in my head, but I'll probably not be making a collage any time soon.

How visual are you? Do you write while having pictures posted around you for inspiration? If so, how much time do you spend looking for those pictures and is it, in your opinion, time well spent?

One foot in at least three seasons...

This morning I woke up to a winter wonderland. At first light, I went out and took pictures, awed by the beauty. My seven-year-old son excitedly bundled up to play - - after some searching for the snow pants and boots, etc. that is. After all, less than two weeks ago it was short sleeve shirts and shorts weather. So, understandably I do suppose, the two of us seem to be in the minority to be so darn happy about this snow fall. Just yesterday, I too was complaining about scraping the thick frost off the car windshield. I was grumbling along with everyone else at the unfairness of it all. How dare winter intrude on our golden days of fall?
But today, with no where I needed to be, I could appreciate the beauty and the uniqueness of a day with one foot in at least three seasons. Besides the snow, there is also fall color and some leftover summer greenery. All three seasons, except spring, although I guess you could call my mood spring-like. I happily trudged through the snow and froze my fingers to inadequately capture the moment on my cell phone camera.

The contradictions for this day were robins on a snowy branch picking at the lingering ruby red crab apples, dark evergreens standing tall and prepared for winter side-by-side with trees still holding on to their green and gold leaves, and lakes unfrozen with boats still tied to docks and buried under snow.

A day to be caught unaware.

But winter didn't smother, afterall, with its early blanket of snow. The robins didn't fly south, the leaves didn't all drop to the ground in defeat and the lake didn't instantly freeze over. I think that's rather special. Like everything can share space, at least for a little while. Maybe that's why I don't feel such sadness for what is passing, but unexpected and simple pleasure in what one day can combine. I'm glad I could have my foot in at least three seasons on one unique day.

How do you feel about the onset of winter? Does it put you in a panic? Would you rather it ease in gradually or in an attempt to change the season with one blow? Any thoughts on if or how it inspires your writing?